Entrepreneur, author, longtime expat. Annalisa Menin lived for 20 years in the United States, where she dealt with an early bereavement and built a new life. Her personal journey is also the emotional basis of her books, including the latest in her trilogy of publications, The Anna to Come, released May 21. A novel about rebirth, inner journeys and complex choices, it gives voice to a powerful and vulnerable female protagonist, Anna Venier, the author’s literary alter ego.
When did the desire to write come about?
“The trigger valve was the loss of my husband. I lost him in his thirties, he was thirty-three, and he had fallen ill with cancer. I needed to keep my mind occupied, and writing was an important anchor. I started in 2014 with a blog, which were very popular at that time, especially in the United States. In Italy it was still something relatively new: there was me, Laura from “Living New York,” Chiara Lady Boss, and shortly after came Marta from “Pics & Tips.” Today there is a new generation of young voices telling New York from different, very interesting points of view.
But at first it was a matter of emotional survival for me: one, to engage the mind; two, because I wanted Marco and our story not to be forgotten. At the time I was almost obsessed with this idea. I thought that a book was a way to fix the memory in time, because a book never goes out of fashion: you can read it today as well as ten years from now, and it continues to talk about it.”
The protagonist of your books is called Anna Venier. What does this alter ego represent for you?
“Having a fictional character allows me to push myself a little further, to explore parallel worlds and make decisions that maybe I would make differently, and also, in part, to protect myself. I can tell something deeply my own, but with a little distance. “Anna” is a name that smacks of simplicity, “Venier” is a surname that recalls my Venetian origins. And then there is also the quote: Anna and Marco, like Dalla’s song.”
In the new novel, The Anna to Come, travel becomes a central element. How did this narrative choice come about?
“It’s a journey I really took. After almost two decades in New York, I felt within me a strong urge for change. It was not a problem of the city-I say this strongly, because I love New York-it was me who needed a personal, rather than a professional, breakthrough. I needed to cut off from what had been.
The initial plan was to move to London, what we might call the European version of New York. But then life took me elsewhere: I met a very special person, who showed me with love what love is, and now I live in the countryside, surrounded by nature, with chickens and cats, one flight away from New York City and the rest of the world. A total change.
Anna, in the book, also makes this journey. After a complicated relationship, she feels the need to start over. She returns to Italy, which is then the place from which everything had started. Travel, in my background, has a deep meaning: I studied in a technical tourism institute, so I have always seen travel not as consumption but as discovery, confrontation, transformation. This is what happens to Anna as well: traveling for her means growing, evolving.”
In the book you deal with very strong women’s issues: dysfunctional relationships, emotional dependence, motherhood.
“I like to say that Anna is all of us. I think many women, especially at times of transition – the 30s, 40s, 50s… – can recognize themselves in her. Self-analysis is a central part of her story. I do not want to give answers or rules, rather to suggest that there are no absolute truths, only individual paths.
The book is divided into two parts, The Anna Who Was and The Anna Who Will Come. The first part is about a relationship that has little to do with love and a lot to do with emotional dependence. To tell the story authentically, I worked with psychotherapist Laura Campanello; I wanted to treat the theme gently but also powerfully. One of the key messages is that emotional addiction happens, you don’t choose it. It doesn’t just affect certain types of women or certain environments: it’s sneaky, it can happen to anyone.
Then there is the theme of motherhood, which runs throughout the trilogy. In The Anna to Come, Anna must make a decision about the sperm of her husband, who died 10 years earlier. She still has a chance to have a child by him. It is a huge choice, especially in a context like Italy, where these issues are still sensitive. To tell the story, I talked to women who had experienced the same grief and had chosen to become mothers after the loss of their partners. It was essential to confront myself with them to really understand.
The book is a kind of great journey back, a modern Odyssey, where at some point you have to come to terms with your origins, and with yourself.”
You are a successful woman, entrepreneur and writer: is being a woman today still difficult? Do we still live in a man-sized society?
“Yes, there is still a long way to go. Whenever I hear ‘we have overcome these problems by now,’ I say, absolutely not. True, compared to my mother’s or grandmother’s generation, without going too far, things have improved, but there is still a long way to go.
I live between the United States and Italy, and I can tell you that even within the United States itself the differences are huge. New York is a happy island but it’s not like that everywhere. I still think that it should not be a struggle between men and women, but a collaboration. The coming together of diversity is the real strength of humanity.
In my journey, at some point, I realized that I had lost a part of my femininity, meaning sweetness, tenderness. In New York you always have to be strong, efficient, smiling. But we women also need to express the other parts of us, not just strength. There is no one box to fit in. “I can fit more than one box.” I can be the businesswoman and also the one who makes a dinner with love. And that goes for men, too.”
What role has New York played in your life and in your writing?
“Fundamental. One of the big crossroads in my life was coming to New York in 2006, at the age of twenty-one. Without New York, I would be a different woman. I don’t say better or worse, but different.
New York taught me tolerance, love of diversity. In Italy we sometimes look at foreigners with suspicion: me, when I see them, I get excited. It taught me not to judge by appearances. In the U.S., the scruffiest person could be a billionaire or a great intellectual or who knows what else…This forces you to look further, to ask questions, to really get to know who you have in front of you not to stop at appearances.
It gave me flexibility, energy, an open-mindedness that I carry with me everywhere. I also have Anna say it in the book: I will always be the girl from New York. No matter where I live today-Italy, London, or elsewhere-she, New York, will always be a part of me. She is a piece of my baggage and an indelible part of my identity. Besides, you know what they say, don’t you? If you can make it here (NYC), you can make it anywhere.”
The article The Anna(lisa Menin) to come: ‘I will always remain the girl from New York’ comes from TheNewyorker.
